Trying to get pregnant can be an emotional roller coaster.
I have seen so many women coming to my practice, desperately wanting to get pregnant, wanting to be “fixed” because “something was wrong with them”.
During the consultation, we discuss at length what is going on with their body: their ovarian reserve, the quality of their eggs, the regularity of their period, whether they suffer from endometriosis or fibroids, what’s their lifestyle’s like.
But there is ONE SUBJECT I am particularly interested in. One subject they rarely talk about with doctors and yet, I find very important. What is going on in their mind? What is their belief system? Is there a reason why they are not getting pregnant other than an issue with their physical or hormonal body?
Although a long look into the mirror can sometimes be emotionally painful, this could be the opportunity for a journey into self-discovery and self-love.
So here are 5 things I would recommend to deepen your understanding of yourself on your fertility journey:
1 | ASK YOURSELF: what has life taught me since trying to become pregnant? What is it that I have learnt about myself, my relationship, my life? Obstacles in life are sometimes on our path to teach us something. Often, once we realise what needed to be learnt and understood, the issue either goes away or is no longer an issue, we are at peace with it. Where are you on this path?
2 | ASK YOURSELF: If there is a reason for me not to get pregnant, what would it be? Do I have a belief, an inner voice telling me why I can’t get pregnant? A belief in the family? We sometimes do not realise the power of the negative (and positive!) thinking in our lives! What is the story you are telling to yourself? Is it positive, loving, hopeful? Mindset, mindset, mindset!
3 | RETREAT to quiet room with a candle, with rose incense or anything that make you feel connected. Perhaps with lovely music in the background. Put one hand on your heart and the other on your uterus and, by doing so, connect them together. Stay like this for a good while and meditate. What comes into your mind? How do you feel?
In my opinion, remaining still and meditating is the most productive thing you can do. Acupuncture, fertility massage and reiki are other great way to connect with yourself and heal.
4 | ASK QUESTIONS OF your mum, your sisters and other women in your family about their experience in fertility. Start a conversation about period, pregnancy, miscarriage, abortion. You may learn a lot from and about them but also about yourself. We sometimes hold beliefs that are not our owns but those from a long ancestral line. Engage in women’s circle! I love women’s circle. Women have so much to share, we have so much to learn from each other.
5 | VISUALISE what you want. I often ask women to remember what their mindset was like when they accomplished a project with ease. They often agree that they “could see it”, they could clearly “visualise it”. So close your eyes and see your life pregnant, with a baby. Think of what life would be like with a child at home. How would you cope with work, your relationship? How do you see yourself as a mother? Do you find it difficult to visualise? Don’t worry. Visualisation is like anything else, it just takes practice! try tomorrow and then, after tomorrow.
So try these 5 things, observe the difference and let me know how you are getting on! The mind is a powerful tool when trying to influence the body. We often undermine its power.
Get in touch to discuss a treatment to suit your needs.
Silene is an acupuncturist, fertility massage therapist and a reiki practitioner at the master level. She has helped many women in their fertility journey.
